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.If I had a dollar for every girl that found me unattractive, they'd eventually find me attractive.I find it ironic that the colors red, white, and blue stand for freedom, until they're flashing behind you.Today a man knocked on my door and asked for a small donation towards the local swimming pool, so I gave him a glass of water.I changed my password to "incorrect" so whenever I forget it the computer will say, "Your password is incorrect."Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.I'm great at multi-tasking--I can waste time, be unproductive, and procrastinate all at once.If you can smile when things go wrong, you have someone in mind to blame.Never tell your problems to anyone, because 20 percent don't care and the other 80 percent are glad you have them.Doesn't expecting the unexpected mean that the unexpected is actually expected?Take my advice — I'm not using it.My wife and I were happy for twenty years; then we met.I hate it when people use big words just to make. He reached down and pulled her shorts down over her ass, gazed at her little white silk panties. Slowly, staring into her eyes, he slipped his hands into her panties and slid a finger into her slit. His finger probed her dry opening causing her to flinch and cry out. Faintly, Janey could hear the Marsha crying in the car trunk. She wondered how long it would be before he "used" her and threw her back with her friends.He took the cuffs off and walked her around to the back of the car. "Sit on the bumper" he ordered her. "Get the top off, get the shorts and panties off too," her ordered. Quickly, Janey stripped, then sat back down. The cold metal bumper under her bare butt and the trunk up against her bare back made her shiver. He lit up one of the joints he had taken from them and took a couple hits, then offered it to her. She took the joint and inhaled deeply, holding it. He offered her a couple more hits. The high quality smoke got her off quickly. He offered her the vodka, told.
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